Huh. Maybe, given enough time and space, I will have the ability to fill this blog out more fully. (“More fully?!” you say.) I’ve realized one thing: this semester in Art classes has me moving a lot faster than I would prefer to. Because I’m moving so quickly through the work, I don’t have as much time as I would like to think about what I’m doing and why, or to give updates; because I’m so busy working (and living).
Right now, I have about…three weeks left to get the vast majority of my work, done: principally, some homework assignments from Figure Drawing (not many, though; and only one which is hard), and the great slosh from Creative Process. 😉 (I haven’t exactly pointed out every single thing to be done and when to have it done by, yet…it’s that intimidating.)
The good thing is that most of what I had been concerned about, is out of the way now. And, given that family will be visiting soon, I should be getting more of it out of the way. But, that isn’t happening at the moment, because I have too much on my mind.
I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s amazing: doing house chores which need to be done, and helping to cook, are two really grounding activities for me. They just make me feel a lot better, even if I don’t have my homework done. Having clean sheets and a room not coated in dust, and good food, and clean hair, and smelling nice, is really a motivation to not let it slip so far next time, too (I still need to clean the bathroom).
Recently, I’ve been spending way too much time at the computer, thinking about this blog…but not sharing much because I haven’t had the time to remember what this blog was/is about, because I’m too preoccupied with all the other demands on my time. (Some of these were immediate, like needing to vacuum and dust; others were [and are] deadlines given through school.)
There has been a benefit to being here and not posting which has become clear, though: when I don’t post, I interact with other bloggers through comments, a lot more. This is a dimension of blogging that I’ve only recently really begun to take up, as I’ve only recently felt really comfortable with it. I don’t think I’ve ever really had a negative comment; but still, it’s nice to be able to help out other people with what I do know, and then that starts building something.
I would really like to build a group of art bloggers whom I can share my work with. Initially, I began sharing my images in order to motivate me to do more (my past works can be stolen, but my skill and capacity to create more cannot be), and because I’ve been warned that after this program is over, it will become much more difficult to remain motivated to do art. One of the things that can counter that, it’s said, is having a group to share work with.
The idea has come up with me, to take my day-to-day journalling (including the time management section) offline, and deal with it in hard-copy format…although this will have me carrying a book (and drawing materials) around everywhere, as versus just my phone. I’ve mentioned before, that it’s much easier to integrate text and image in an art journal than it is to composite something for a blog. It’s still true. It’s pretty near effortless to draw in an unlined journal instead of write, as compared with drawing, photographing/scanning, editing, and uploading — as versus typing. If I’m going to be posting images, I’m thinking it better be for a reason…and that reason is something I’ve become distant from.
Then there is the reminder I’ve found hanging somewhere back in my mind, where one of my acquaintances said that I seemed to be a really “private” person. At the time, I didn’t know where they were coming from…but, it isn’t a goal of mine to be known. If I’m going to make anything out of myself, though, I’m going to have to be open to the possibility. I think that my largest issue, looking back on all of this, is remaining mysterious even though I’m still constantly being honest. I mean, the acquaintance in question is someone I spoke about really deep issues with, and they still did not feel they knew me.
This is just a note on the trail. I haven’t yet reached the point where I can, as I want to, develop a looseleaf system of sketching and watercolor-sketching pages. I have an idea of one place I can go to try and search for materials to start one, though. Well, at least two: Daiso and Maido. The third serious stationery store I knew of, closed down. I could also try Flax…but I’ve never been there, and it’s quite a drive! Then, there’s always Staples and their system of looseleaf binding; something I found first in Levenger’s catalog…alluring if I get a punch and start assembling my own booklets to carry. I mean, I could carry different types of paper in the same packet; bind them on whatever edge I want.
Why not get creative with this, eh?
All right, I think I’ve gotten most of that stuff, out. The question still remains as to what role the blog is going to take in my life. At this point I realize that sharing for the sake of “Likes” is more a marketing thing and less an actual…honest, grassroots wanting-to-share thing. I learned a while back that the “Likes” happen most often when I keep up a regular posting schedule, but somewhere along the line — and I think this happens to a lot of people — the “Likes” can get addictive, and then we start wondering how to gain more “Likes,” and that overshadows the content of the blog.
I don’t think I’m going away; it’s just that I have to reconsider what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and what are appropriate forums (or record formats) for all of my work…