Setting destination

I know it’s late, but…I actually just finished cleaning up and reorganizing the art and craft area.  It looks like I’ll actually be able to get some work done, down there, now!  M says it’s hard for her to work in a cluttered space, and…I should be able to see how much that applies to me, now.

I was awake and active for most of the day.  A friend came over, so I had something to look forward to.  Someone on my feed was talking about the little $10 organizers from Target, the other day — I have a large one in the same style, just a plastic frame with three drawers.

It worked really nicely for putting my stuff away.  The only drawback is that now my heavy-duty wire cutters seem out of place.  I moved most of the beading and jewelry stuff that was in there, out of the way, in order to make more room for the art supplies.  After all, that beading stuff has been there untouched for what seems like a number of years, now.  Pretty much the only reason I’ve gone in there is for the wire cutters and the thread burner (both of which are still located there), so hopefully this will be much more useful.

What I can see being of more use in the future is a very low shelf, either a cube-type thing, or something like a shoe stand.  Because of the way the table is constructed (it’s a folding table with diagonal braces), it’s not able to accommodate a lot of under-table space to storage.  However, there is some space there, in front of where my feet rest when I’m sitting or standing at the table.

The only drawback is that it’s very close to one of the ants’ favorite spots to invade, and although I’ve never seen them go after art supplies, sometimes they walk all over things that don’t make sense.

I want to start something going where every day when I wake up, I write a little at that table.  I’ve set things up for tomorrow; my prior spiritual practice journal is going down there.  I haven’t used it in a long time — the first entries are from 2011, and there has only been one entry within the past year.  Since my creating does feel spiritual for me, and crafting my life also feels spiritual for me…especially in view of aging and the need to become independent (I need to do so before my parents can’t care for me anymore); I am hoping that this can be a place where I can get out what I need to along the process of making.

So the making part of this links back to my reason to survive — or my crutch to survive — though the spirit contact portion of this has been quieter, recently.  I think it’s due to my third medication, but I can’t quite remember at this point what year I started that, exactly.  My records should say — I record every night when I take them — but it’s been so long since I’ve been on this last one that I think years have passed, and I’m not sure how many.

I feel more like I’m getting in tune with myself, even though what “myself” is, isn’t always expected.  Career things are important because this will give me financial support so that I can to continue to make and not be homeless or dependent or in poverty.

There are bumps on both the creative side and the practical side, though.  I didn’t realize until recently how much having a place to vent my frustrations about, say, Library school; and to be given a realistic choice not to go back to Library school; made it much easier not to be controlled by my frustrations about Library school.

But…that’s something that maybe I should write about more, in a private place.  Like my spiritual journal.  Which may end up being my spiritual/psychology/parapsychology journal.  🙂

That sounds good.

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Haru ("Codey") is a third-year Master's student in Library and Information Science, hoping to find a way to fuse their desire to make the world a better place and to finance their art.

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